Football season is nearly upon us, which means it's time to start writing about my beloved Colts yet again. For those readers who don't like the Colts or, GASP!, don't care about football? I apologize and look forward to your return come February.
Because I am such a big Colts fan (I've even been described as rabid), you may wonder why I don't have my very own season tickets. Good question. So as we approach yet another football season, here are the Top 10 Reasons Why I Don't Have Colts Season Tickets.
1. All the good tailgating spots are already taken.
2. I'm still protesting their decision to punt the perfect season.
3. If we spend all our cash on season tickets, there won't be any bail money left over for when I streak the field to show off the giant #18 tattoo I got on my backside during the off-season.
4. I gave up football for curling after the Winter Olympics.
5. I'm holding out for Bill Polian to call and ask me to be the Official Mommyblogger of the Indianapolis Colts.
6. Really, it's all downhill after the preseason.
7. Crappy internet reception in Lucas Oil Stadium means I can't keep up with my fantasy team.
8. Yet AGAIN, Mike chokes at the World Series of Poker.
9. Peyton Manning asked me to lay low with our love child until Archie Jr. fully develops his throwing arm.
10. I'm secretly a Patriots fan.
Totally kidding about #10. You'd have to kill me first. But Bill Polian? I'm waiting.