Screw It.

"Momma, can I screw this?"

    {translation: Can I take this toy apart with a screwdriver?}

    {imagine how mortified he'll be someday to know he once asked permission from his mother.}

"Momma, I'm a really good screwer, right?"

Yes, son.  Yes, you are.

    {insert inappropriate joke about being a chip off the old block here.}

Lock up any valuables that can be disassembled with a screwdriver.  We nearly lost Elena's Nintendo DSi to Eli's masterful screwing.  The poor See-n-Say never had a chance.