Of Valentines and Love Letters

Love is in the air!  There’s something about Valentine’s Day when you have your very own sweetie and kids.  There’s the fun in sharing the love with your special someone, and then there’s the fun of sharing the love with your kids – Valentine’s made out of Legos and construction paper and crayons.  Sticky kisses and, after the kids are in bed, maybe some passionate kisses.

We don’t typically do gifts for Valentine’s Day.  I have a little something for the kids, but for Mike I opted to write a love letter instead.  I was inspired by my friend Jen’s post about what your husband really wants for Valentine’s Day.  

I loved this idea, particularly because we’re in that phase of our marriage (the being-together-for-awhile phase, with some of the I’m-so-tired-and-frazzled phase thrown in for good measure) where sentiments of love and kindness are not so easily given.  No, our conversations seem to lean toward the mundane (let’s look over this new health insurance policy) or snippy (do you really think that’s the best way to load the dishwasher?).  So what better occasion than a day devoted to love to take the time to say some kinder words instead?  I began the letter with this:

You would think that the longer we’re together and the more comfortable we are with each other, the easier it would be to say those special things we need to hear.  But it seems the opposite, that the more days we share as husband and wife the easier it is to speak unkindly, to overlook all the wonderful things about each other and focus on the shortcomings.  I’m sorry for that, and I will try to do better.  

And ended it with this:

Thank you for being you, and thank you for loving me – no matter how grumpy or stubborn I am.   I love you, Valentine.

All the stuff that’s in between is super mushy and embarrassing and private.  Just the way a good love letter should be.  

Another thing I adore about Valentine’s Day is the arrival of our Miami Merger Valentine.  Every year Miami University sends its Mergers (Miami grads who married a fellow Miami grad) a special Valentine.  They’re always unique – sometimes funny and other times, like this year, they make me all weepy and sentimental.  14% of Miami alumni are mergers, compared with a national average of 3-9% at other colleges and universities.  I don’t know why that is (something in the water? or the drinks at Mac & Joe’s?), but I’m so glad I found my merger.

Happy Valentine’s Day!