Merry Christmas! Did you have a good one? We most certainly did. Despite an ear infection (Eli) and stopped-up sinuses (Mike and I), we had a most wonderful holiday. Our kids are at the Christmas sweet spot – old enough to be so thoroughly into it that Christmas spirit seeps out of their very pores, but not so old that you can’t afford a single thing on their list. Those days are certainly numbered, as things such as iPads, netbooks, and televisions have creeped on to Elena’s list, so we were deeply content to enjoy this year as it was.
Speaking of gifts that don’t have to cost a fortune to please, let me introduce you to the hit of the season: a fine little game known as Doggie Doo. I wish I could take credit for this one, but it was a gift from Aunt Ana. She knows us well – as soon as she saw it she knew it had my children’s names written all over it.
The premise of the “game” is this: you have this wiener dog that needs fed and walked. When he makes a mess, you clean it up. The object is to be the first person to clean up 3 pieces of dog crap. Much like dog crap in the yard, the rules were quickly forgotten. The object of the game in my kids’ eyes was to get the dog to crap as much as possible. Big and little kids alike were delighted … we are a classy bunch.
As is wont to happen when one eats too much junk, the poor dog’s system got stopped up. Before Christmas day was over we had a very constipated canine on our hands. And that’s how I found myself doing things to the poor dog that aren’t fit for a family blog. Let’s just say I did things that would make a proctologist shiver. In the end, it was a good, old-fashioned enema that did the trick. Sadly, getting the dog to drop a load was the most productive thing I did all day. And like a good dump when you really need one, it felt pretty good to check that off my list.
(Yes, his poo is neon yellow. No I can’t explain why. The entire idea of the game is beyond explanation.)
Happy New Year, friends. May your 2012 be happy and filled with love and healthy bowel movements.