Once upon a time I got an e-mail forward in which pictures were attached of a naked boy covered head to toe in maxi pads. It was funny, I laughed, and yet deep down I believed the pictures were a hoax. Somebody set that poor kid up.
And then I left my son unattended for a few minutes while I attended to some *ahem* personal business . . .
Poor kid thought they were stickers. I promise you, I buy my children real, actual toys . . . and stickers. But who can resist a pile of Kotex Light Days pantiliners just hanging around, waiting to be unwrapped and applied wherever your little heart desires?
And now I will proceed to do very manly things, such as sawing my workbench, whilst sporting some very feminine products upon my polo shirt.
And so this leads me to a very hotly debated topic here in the Six household. Are feminine products in and of themselves revolting? I purposely left Eli's "stickers" in place until Mike got home because I knew it would get his knickers all in a knot. He can't stand dealing with anything that relates to a monthly cycle. When we first got married, I thought it was just one of his many oddities, but the longer I live, the more I realize most men have issues with feminine products.
I was once shopping in Kroger in Nashville late in the evening. I was perusing the paper towel/napkin aisle when a hapless fellow wandered near my cart. He had a very long list, and he looked confused.
"Excuse me," he said, "Can you help me with something?"
"Sure," I replied. I'm nothing if not helpful.
"My wife just had a baby, and she sent me to pick up some things. I've gotten just about everything, but there's this one thing I can't seem to find. Do you know where I can find sanitary napkins?"
Poor guy. He thought he was actually trying to find an actual napkin of the face-wiping sort.
I told him where he might find them. He turned 10 shades of red and scurried away, cursing the mother of his newborn child under his breath.
A couple of months ago I twittered this: Eli must have gotten into my tampons again. There are bite marks on all of them.
It was met with much disgust from my male friends. Why is this? As I said in reply, it's not as if feminine products are pre-tested before they leave the factory. I've yet to see a guy recoil in disgust at the thought of touching a pack of condoms. Don't they all end up in or around the same place?
I told Mike we would settle this argument once and for all, so it's up to you guys to tell it like is.
Picture of our son plastered with pads: funny or gross? And if you have your own "feminine" story to share, please do!